Daria got a really bad ear infection and needed to have a minor procedure done. She was in the hospital for a day or two and missed school for a week to recover.
After the third day of her absence, I explained to the class where she was even though no one noticed she was gone. Anni asked with a quivering lip why Daria was in the hospital.
Before I could explain, Jay asks, “Is it because when she spilled Kool-aid on the carpet last week?”
I think maybe Jay has been witness to some domestic violence.
Showing posts with label Jay. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jay. Show all posts
Sunday, November 8, 2015
16: Quote from the Playground
On the playground:
Jay runs up to me holding a clump of grass that he had just ripped out of the schoolyard in his hand.
Jay: “Miss Pell, do you have a bag?”
MP: “For what Jay?”
Jay: “For my grass stupid.”
MP: “Jay we don’t call people stupid and we don’t keep grass. Throw it down.”
Jay, said while exiting in a semi-stomping tantrum, “My brother gets to keep his grass in a bag!”
This was followed up by an awkward call from me to Jay’s parents.
Jay runs up to me holding a clump of grass that he had just ripped out of the schoolyard in his hand.
Jay: “Miss Pell, do you have a bag?”
MP: “For what Jay?”
Jay: “For my grass stupid.”
MP: “Jay we don’t call people stupid and we don’t keep grass. Throw it down.”
Jay, said while exiting in a semi-stomping tantrum, “My brother gets to keep his grass in a bag!”
This was followed up by an awkward call from me to Jay’s parents.
15: Meet Misty
Misty is not like most of my kids. Misty is autistic; sort of like Dustin Hoffman in ‘Rainman.’ As if this isn’t enough, she also has Tourettes Syndrome. This means that has an amazing memory, has problems relating to others and interacting socially, and twitches, yelps and swears like a sailor when she gets provoked. It can make for an interesting class.
Misty really enjoys telling stories about television shows she watches at home. She knows everything there is to know about Xena: Warrior Princess, and she can remember so many little details about that show--that’s the autism at work.
Then there is the Tourettes side of Misty.
She has a rather severe case and is on medication to control the spasms and ticks. Sometimes when she’s nervous or angry, she’ll have a mild facial tick here and there. But the obscenities are more difficult to control.
A few days ago, the class was busy working on individual projects when I noticed that Jay was talking rather fiercely to Misty. He was really getting in her face saying something about her drawing. Due to her autism, Misty tends to focus on her tasks intently, thus it is an effort to try and get her to break concentration when we are switching to a new project. Jay was persistent in distracting her and kept right on doing so, yet no matter what he said nothing seemed to be fazing Misty.
I was about to tell Jay’s to stop yammering at Misty, when she stopped coloring and looked up from her drawing. She had a sudden movement where she cocked her head to the right, blinked her eyes a few times, looked at Jay and said,
"Sss…ssslut ass buuhhh-uuuttt fucker!”
Then she simply resumed coloring. Jay glanced towards at me with shock stamped on his face. I gave him a look, and kept on reading my magazine article. He didn't bother her the rest of class.
Misty really enjoys telling stories about television shows she watches at home. She knows everything there is to know about Xena: Warrior Princess, and she can remember so many little details about that show--that’s the autism at work.
Then there is the Tourettes side of Misty.
She has a rather severe case and is on medication to control the spasms and ticks. Sometimes when she’s nervous or angry, she’ll have a mild facial tick here and there. But the obscenities are more difficult to control.
A few days ago, the class was busy working on individual projects when I noticed that Jay was talking rather fiercely to Misty. He was really getting in her face saying something about her drawing. Due to her autism, Misty tends to focus on her tasks intently, thus it is an effort to try and get her to break concentration when we are switching to a new project. Jay was persistent in distracting her and kept right on doing so, yet no matter what he said nothing seemed to be fazing Misty.
I was about to tell Jay’s to stop yammering at Misty, when she stopped coloring and looked up from her drawing. She had a sudden movement where she cocked her head to the right, blinked her eyes a few times, looked at Jay and said,
"Sss…ssslut ass buuhhh-uuuttt fucker!”
Then she simply resumed coloring. Jay glanced towards at me with shock stamped on his face. I gave him a look, and kept on reading my magazine article. He didn't bother her the rest of class.
13: Very safe sex
I think some parents don’t understand how much their behavior influences their children. Take Jay for example.
Jay came to school today and kept fidgeting more than normal. He’d scoot around his chair as if he was totally uncomfortable, and kept adjusting his pants. This became a nuisance in class because some of the others thought he getting away with itching his butt, which is a no-no in our classroom.
I took Jay outside in the hall to ask him what was wrong and why he was fidgeting.
Miss Pell "Why do you keep itching?”
Jay "Cause.”
Miss Pell "Cause why?”
Jay "Cause I’m covered.”
Miss Pell "Cause you’re what?”
Jay "I’m covered. I’m safe. I can be around Anni and the other girls now.”
Not knowing what he was talking about, I called two male teachers to come down and asked them to walk Jay into the nurse’s office to investigate. They came back 10 minutes later with grins.
Apparently, Jay’s older brother, who is in a normal class, told Jay that in order for him to be around girls, he needed to be covered. That is, he needed to wear a condom. Otherwise the girls would get pregnant.
I guess his brother put a condom on him the night before and Jay thought it stayed on until you wanted to get a girl pregnant, so he never took it off.
I called his parents and told them to have a talk with their sons.
Jay came to school today and kept fidgeting more than normal. He’d scoot around his chair as if he was totally uncomfortable, and kept adjusting his pants. This became a nuisance in class because some of the others thought he getting away with itching his butt, which is a no-no in our classroom.
I took Jay outside in the hall to ask him what was wrong and why he was fidgeting.
Miss Pell "Why do you keep itching?”
Jay "Cause.”
Miss Pell "Cause why?”
Jay "Cause I’m covered.”
Miss Pell "Cause you’re what?”
Jay "I’m covered. I’m safe. I can be around Anni and the other girls now.”
Not knowing what he was talking about, I called two male teachers to come down and asked them to walk Jay into the nurse’s office to investigate. They came back 10 minutes later with grins.
Apparently, Jay’s older brother, who is in a normal class, told Jay that in order for him to be around girls, he needed to be covered. That is, he needed to wear a condom. Otherwise the girls would get pregnant.
I guess his brother put a condom on him the night before and Jay thought it stayed on until you wanted to get a girl pregnant, so he never took it off.
I called his parents and told them to have a talk with their sons.
12: Pee Water
Today Steve wet his pants. This by itself is not a strange thing to happen in my class, but with Steve it can present unique challenges. Steve is severely handicapped--both physically and mentally, and is confined to a motorized wheelchair.
We were playing with Lincoln logs and trying to work on counting and other coordination activities. Steve was banging his logs on the table in his puddles of drool, so I left him at that while I helped Sara with her counting. Sara informed me that Lincoln Logs reminded her of her grandma’s sausage.
Suddenly, I felt a light tap on my shoulder. Anni was standing there all giggling and smiling as she does often. She just kept giggling and didn’t say anything when I asked her what was going on, so I turned around to help Sara again.
Anni tapped me on the shoulder again. “Hehehehehe Miss Pell, hehehehe Stevie is leaking. Hehehe.”
Since Anni usually doesn’t make sense anyway, I ignored her for the second time to pick up Sara’s logs so she would not try to nibble/eat/swallow them. As I was putting them back in the bin, I felt another tap on my shoulder.
It was Jay this time. Now, Jay knows right from wrong. He has severe ADHD and he is a VERY slow learner, but other than that, he’s the most normal in the class.
He is holding Anni’s hand while she still giggles. He points at Steve, who from here I can see has a dark blue stain in the crotch of his baby blue sweat pants. There was so much urine that it managed to pour down the sides of his motorized chair. I was unclear when exactly the wetting had occurred, and was about to ask Jay about this when he says,
"Steve spilt water, but it tastes acky!,” he says while making a face like he just sucked a lemon.
Oh please no.
I called my TA and they took Steve to the office for cleaning. I then made Jay drink a lot of juice and wash his hands. I wouldn't tell him why, nor did I ask him how he knew what that "water" tasted like.
We were playing with Lincoln logs and trying to work on counting and other coordination activities. Steve was banging his logs on the table in his puddles of drool, so I left him at that while I helped Sara with her counting. Sara informed me that Lincoln Logs reminded her of her grandma’s sausage.
Suddenly, I felt a light tap on my shoulder. Anni was standing there all giggling and smiling as she does often. She just kept giggling and didn’t say anything when I asked her what was going on, so I turned around to help Sara again.
Anni tapped me on the shoulder again. “Hehehehehe Miss Pell, hehehehe Stevie is leaking. Hehehe.”
Since Anni usually doesn’t make sense anyway, I ignored her for the second time to pick up Sara’s logs so she would not try to nibble/eat/swallow them. As I was putting them back in the bin, I felt another tap on my shoulder.
It was Jay this time. Now, Jay knows right from wrong. He has severe ADHD and he is a VERY slow learner, but other than that, he’s the most normal in the class.
He is holding Anni’s hand while she still giggles. He points at Steve, who from here I can see has a dark blue stain in the crotch of his baby blue sweat pants. There was so much urine that it managed to pour down the sides of his motorized chair. I was unclear when exactly the wetting had occurred, and was about to ask Jay about this when he says,
"Steve spilt water, but it tastes acky!,” he says while making a face like he just sucked a lemon.
Oh please no.
I called my TA and they took Steve to the office for cleaning. I then made Jay drink a lot of juice and wash his hands. I wouldn't tell him why, nor did I ask him how he knew what that "water" tasted like.
11: Pie
While walking past the cafeteria on the way to the library, Erik started crying. Jay yelled at him:
Jay "Shut your pie hole!”
Sara, while running up to Jay, "Who has pie !?!?”
Jay "Shut your pie hole!”
Sara, while running up to Jay, "Who has pie !?!?”
8: Brownie Bites
Since fall is right around the corner and the chill is evident in the morning air, I decided to let the kids play games outside today. Before we went outside, we had lunch. Today Sara’s mom packed her a turkey sandwich (no mayo Sara announced) and carrot sticks instead of these brownie bites she usually has.
After Sara cried and had a tantrum for about 20 minutes upon finding this sub-par lunch, she finally sat down at her desk and inhaled her lunch. I think she chewed twice. We decided what games to play outside and I released them.
It was so nice out that I decided to bring Tucker Max’s book out with me for some entertainment. As I read, I casually scanned the grounds after every other paragraph, making sure the kids were all behaving.
I saw Jay and Anni doing some animal impression, but as long as they weren’t hooking the vacuum up to her it was fine. Then I saw Sara sitting on the grass near the fence, by herself, picking at stuff. I figured she was still upset about having to eat carrot sticks today, so I let her be.
After 45 minutes I called the class together and we went inside. We were settled in and about to read a book when I heard Misty speak up from the back. “Miss Pell, Sara isn’t sharing her treats.” I went to the back to see what Sara was doing. When I got to her desk, I saw three hard cylindrical objects sitting on her desk. By the smell alone, I knew immediately what they were.
Sara had three hardened dog turds sitting on her desk. From the looks, I’d say they came from a shih-tzu or some medium sized dog in the toy group. [Now while I tell this last part, remember I just saw dog crap on the kids desk and in my mind I was running over the vision of her sitting and picking at stuff near the fence just minutes before, so my late reaction is justified]
Bright eyed Sara looks at me and says, “I found my brownie bites” and no shit, the kid popped one in her mouth like it was, well…a brownie bite.
OH MY GOD!
I didn’t know what to do. I stood frozen in horror as I watched her chew and ingest the canine fecal matter with the look of content and ecstasy on her plump face. She’d been outside eating turds for a half hour already, what could one more do?
I quickly snagged the other two and threw them away. I didn’t know what to do, so I called her to the front of the room, gave her a couple tic tacs, and tried to forget what.
After Sara cried and had a tantrum for about 20 minutes upon finding this sub-par lunch, she finally sat down at her desk and inhaled her lunch. I think she chewed twice. We decided what games to play outside and I released them.
It was so nice out that I decided to bring Tucker Max’s book out with me for some entertainment. As I read, I casually scanned the grounds after every other paragraph, making sure the kids were all behaving.
I saw Jay and Anni doing some animal impression, but as long as they weren’t hooking the vacuum up to her it was fine. Then I saw Sara sitting on the grass near the fence, by herself, picking at stuff. I figured she was still upset about having to eat carrot sticks today, so I let her be.
After 45 minutes I called the class together and we went inside. We were settled in and about to read a book when I heard Misty speak up from the back. “Miss Pell, Sara isn’t sharing her treats.” I went to the back to see what Sara was doing. When I got to her desk, I saw three hard cylindrical objects sitting on her desk. By the smell alone, I knew immediately what they were.
Sara had three hardened dog turds sitting on her desk. From the looks, I’d say they came from a shih-tzu or some medium sized dog in the toy group. [Now while I tell this last part, remember I just saw dog crap on the kids desk and in my mind I was running over the vision of her sitting and picking at stuff near the fence just minutes before, so my late reaction is justified]
Bright eyed Sara looks at me and says, “I found my brownie bites” and no shit, the kid popped one in her mouth like it was, well…a brownie bite.
OH MY GOD!
I didn’t know what to do. I stood frozen in horror as I watched her chew and ingest the canine fecal matter with the look of content and ecstasy on her plump face. She’d been outside eating turds for a half hour already, what could one more do?
I quickly snagged the other two and threw them away. I didn’t know what to do, so I called her to the front of the room, gave her a couple tic tacs, and tried to forget what.
2: Milking
There are two tards in my class, Anni and Jay, that live relatively close to each other, and sometimes they come to school together. After today, I am guessing they must also play together.
I come into my classroom 5 minutes after my tards are finished with recess. I was late because I was talking to another teacher and lost track of time.
[Before I tell you the rest picture in your head how the vacuum looks when you put the tube end on instead of the vacuum head when you clean your walls or ceiling as opposed to the floor.]
I walk into the room to find Anni on all fours with her shirt hiked up and Jay holding the tube handle of the vacuum cleaner against her boob.
Jay “Miss Pell! Look!…..Milking!”
Anni “HA HA HA!,” laughs Anni with an aroused tard smile on her face.
I had to stifle the laughter and tears as I un-hooked the “milker” and told them to take their seats for coloring.
I come into my classroom 5 minutes after my tards are finished with recess. I was late because I was talking to another teacher and lost track of time.
[Before I tell you the rest picture in your head how the vacuum looks when you put the tube end on instead of the vacuum head when you clean your walls or ceiling as opposed to the floor.]
I walk into the room to find Anni on all fours with her shirt hiked up and Jay holding the tube handle of the vacuum cleaner against her boob.
Jay “Miss Pell! Look!…..Milking!”
Anni “HA HA HA!,” laughs Anni with an aroused tard smile on her face.
I had to stifle the laughter and tears as I un-hooked the “milker” and told them to take their seats for coloring.
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